The Day I Gave Up.

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by Anna Faith

When you are a single twenty something, you do a lot of thinking. And watching. You watch your friends settle happily into their “marital bliss”. You think. You watch their children be born and make those mile-marker memories. You think. You watch friends graduate. You think and rethink your purpose in life. Too often, I have found, there is that temptation to doubt the Lord’s GOOD plans for our life. Sure, He’s got a plan. But GOOD? Hm. That sneaky Enemy (whose main goal is to steal, kill and destroy, mind you) often waves the whole “I drew the short straw” notion under my nose like a sock with that never recovered partner. Kind of unfortunate, a little awkward and always alone. “You’re always going to be alone, and one step behind”. 

Jeepers. That devil sure is mean.

As I waded through some deep, stormy waters in my “newly twenty” years, I was faced with wave after wave doubting God’s good plan. I had my network of people that I knew loved me, but I felt alone as I faced “trials of various kinds” (James 1:2). Most of my friends were over eight hours away, which was an additional blow. I was brought to my knees with intense relationship conflicts, illness, deaths, and emotions I’ve never had to deal with before (Hey, I’m an INTJ. We don’t feel emotions quite the same way *wink*). There were times where I would lay curled up in my bed, so emotionally weary and tired. Thoughts of “if only I had a shoulder to cry on. If only I had that privileged of a strong arm around my shoulders…if only” popped up at unsuspecting times. I saw people around me, going through similar things, but they seemed to have that support I craved. My friends could go home to their husbands. I went home to my quiet little room.

“Lord, what are you up to? Why does it seem like you have placed me in a quiet place–alone? What is your purpose in this?”

I will never, ever forget His response. It was forever branded onto my heart about a year ago.

He told me it was because He was giving me a gift. A gift of friendship. He wanted to not just be called my best friend–He wanted to BE my best friend. He told me HE wanted to be the One to hold my hand, the one to gently lead me. He wanted to be my heart-holder. He wanted to be my strength. He wanted to be my “husband”. [FYI, I burst into tears every time I stop to think about it (which is a big deal for us INTJ’s)]

I have walked with the Lord since I was 13, but grew up “knowing” about the Lord since I was born. My dad was a minister for almost 20 years. I knew about the Lord’s character. Yet, we can know ABOUT the Lord’s character….but fail to KNOW HIM. I have known Him as my dearest friend, but that day He took our friendship to such a deeper level of my heart. A level I didn’t even know I could have.

 

So, I gave up. I gave up that comparison game. I gave up dreading quietness. I gave up that “score keeping”. Sure, I do want to get married. That is a deep, strong desire within my heart. There are days where I question if I’m just…not worth loving. Days where I feel ugly and awkward. But when you give your heart–your entire heart–to Someone who you can trust, He fills that “space”. He fills your days with joy, He fills your HEART with laughter. It’s the devil which feeds us lies of insecurity, DOUBT, and fear. That’s not God. It is not God’s desire for us to be afraid that “we are missing out”. In fact, my BEST adventures are the ones which God has planned…and He’s always gone with me.

Singleness is NOT “that awkward time in between stages of life”. Singleness doesn’t mean you “have it wrong”, or that you failed. Singleness means God is giving you the sweetest, most beautiful opportunity to know HIM–and I mean really know Him–in a way you could never imagine. It means you get the Creator of a heartbeat as a confidant. You get the one who hung up the stars as your best friend. He sings over you. He gave the only Son He ever had to humbly bear your sins, just so you could be saved FROM your sins.

I am my Beloved’s, and He IS mine. Trust Him. Remember Him. KNOW Him. He is that hand to hold, that under-girding strength, that Joy, and that calming peaceful presence to quiet anxiety.

He wants to be your Best friend. Will you let Him?

Christ Will Not Divorce You

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Recently, I was visiting my mom, who read me the following quote from a devotion she has, written by the faithful Puritans of the past, and it really stuck out to me:

“Your sins shall never provoke Christ to give you a bill of divorce.  They may provoke Him to frown upon you, chide you, correct you, but they will never provoke Christ to give you a bill of divorce.”  Thomas Brooks

As I pondered this quote, the truth of it resounded more and more clearly in my soul.  The analogy of a divorce is one that rings true to our lack of commitment in our relationships with the Lord.  “…if we are faithless, He remains faithful, for He cannot deny Himself.” 2 Timothy 2:13

For it is Christ Himself who said, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.” Matthew 19:8  Jesus does not believe in divorce.  He’s not a fan.  His heart is grieved by it just as much in our relationship with Him as with one another.  He made our relationships on earth to reflect our relationship with Him…and He intended from the beginning that they would be steadfast, immovable, and committed until “death do us part”.

Christ will never let go of us, give up, or send us away.  Even when we have sinned, and we think we cannot possibly return to God, for surely He has given up on us and, essentially, “divorced” us…even then, it is we ourselves who are doing the excluding.  Christ has shown us His heart in this matter yet again, when He said, “Return, faithless Israel, declares the Lord.  I will not look on you in anger, for I am merciful, declares the Lord; I will not be angry forever.” Jeremiah 3:11

WE are the ones who do the wandering, as God waits patiently, hoping — longing — for our return.  We get tired of God’s ways, and begin to wander after other “loves”.  We decide we’ve had enough, and that we don’t want to hold fast to our commitment.  We start looking for loopholes in our commitment, and start looking for a “divorce”.

“But I have this against you, that YOU have abandoned the love you had at first.” Revelation 2:4

If we have a broken relationship with God, it is not God’s fault.  It is because of our own hardness toward God, and our own lack of commitment and love.  But God has made the simplest way imaginable for us to return and be reconciled again, if we have wandered or sinned!  It is as simple as turning back, repenting for our sins and our wandering hearts, and learning to DELIGHT in Him again (see our post: The Delight Challenge), as a new bride delights in the husband of her heart!  Then you will find your relationship with God restored, the weight of sin and the loneliness of separation from Him removed, as well as the joy of first love again flooding your heart!  It is never too late to return, because Jesus remains faithful even when we are faithless, and stubborn.  He is SO good!

 

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Facing Discouragement as a True Friend of God

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I don’t have a normal life.  In fact…my life is incredibly crazy.  I don’t usually like to write much about myself, but here’s just a little peek into our lives, as just a little bit of background for what I’ve been thinking about today.

We travel a lot, because of my husband’s family being a musical group.  We go anywhere and everywhere we’re invited.  And that leads to some pretty…interesting…experiences.  You probably wouldn’t believe the crazies we see.  People think that traveling and sharing the gospel and playing music must be so glamorous and exciting.  WELL…it’s exciting because we’re doing it for the Lord, and we get to see real and lasting fruit from our labors.  But…it’s not glamorous.  We chuckled today as we recounted some of the places we’ve stayed — from squishing nine people into one dilapidated motel room, to camping in tents next to alligator-infested waters, to…well…basically, if you can dream it up, it’s probably happened to us…and then some. 😉  We also find ourselves presenting our shows in many different places, to many different crowds.  Sometimes we’ve had a jam-packed full theater with four hundred people all riveted throughout the show.  Other times, we’ve had churches, partially filled, but with people who had tears streaming down their faces by the end of the night because the Lord had so touched their hearts.  And other times…well…other times, it can be downright discouraging.  Like last night.  We had a miscommunication with a newspaper that was supposed to run our concert ad for two weeks in a row, and it only got run one week……the day of the show.  We had eight people come.  In a large auditorium.  Eight people is not a lot.  In fact, it’s downright awkward in many ways.  But we thanked God for those eight people, and did a show for them anyway.  But afterwards, several of our family were feeling pretty discouraged.  It’s times like these when you’ve given all your own money and time and lots of effort and sacrifice for what you think the Lord wanted you to do…and held on in faith till the last moment…and then, things don’t go the way you thought they should, that the devil slinks in and begins to fill your mind with doubts.  Suddenly, you wonder…did you really hear from God??  Do you do the wrong thing?  Did you not have enough faith?  Should you even be serving the Lord at all?  Maybe there’s someone else who is better qualified…someone who could actually have the success you had hoped for…maybe…maybe…

 

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But as I pondered the night, the only thing that came to my mind, again and again was a quiet whisper of, “But…the Kingdom of Heaven is made of such as these.”

I paused…and pondered.  Yes.  It’s true.  The Kingdom of Heaven is made of men and women who have given everything they had for Jesus…and many of them never saw any fruit for it.  The Kingdom of Heaven is made of those who have laid down their very lives for Jesus, and never lived to see the salvation of many hundreds which has come from their sacrifice.  The Kingdom of Heaven is made of those who have had many disappointments and those who have looked like complete failures to those looking on, for the sake of Christ…..and yet…..He looks down with the greatest love, tears pooling in His eyes, His heart overflowing with gratitude that He has found true friends; those who are willing to suffer with Him for the sake of some that might be rescued.  It is not an unusual thing for the children of God to encounter trials…but we must press forward, and not lose heart.  Trust…and obey.

So, may you be encouraged.  Whether you are in ministry, or whether you think God may be leading you in that direction, or whether you are simply trying to be faithful in reaching out to those God puts in your path — yes, there will be difficulties, hardships, disappointments, and much testing of our faith…but the Kingdom of Heaven is made of such as these.  God’s heart is so gladdened to have true friends, who love Him more than the comforts and success and acclaim of the world.  Friends who are willing to suffer with Him.  And God doesn’t say that if we have difficulties or what seems like failures we HAVE failed.  He just asks us to be obedient, to not lose heart, and to press forward in what He has called us to do.  We can trust Him, and entrust the fruit to Him.  He will bring forth a harvest for all that we entrust to His care…for any fruit that springs up can only come by Him and through Him anyway.  If you’ve ever tried making something happen in your own strength, you can attest to what I’m saying. 😉

 

Feel free to share what God has been teaching you lately in the comments, and what He has encouraged you with in the midst of your own difficulties and disappointments. 

 

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Turning Away From The Mirror (and to God’s Word)

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Post by: Anna Faith

 

Ever have one of those days where you just want to avoid the mirror? I don’t care WHAT size you are, we can always find things to dislike about ourselves. “I am too overweight,” “I am too skinny,” “I have a huge nose,” “my eyes are too far apart,” “my hands are huge,” “I’m so stupid,” “I walk weird,” “I hate my laugh,” “my hair is so frustrating,”…and on and on the list scrolls. You probably thought of a few to add just now, didn’t you?

The teen years were a difficult self-image period for me. I was always “curvier” than my other friends, and my closest friend happened to be a “00”. I would squirm when we would go shopping. My friend had the hardest time understanding why I would always have a difficult time finding clothes that “looked right”, when she would quickly fill up an entire cart. I would pile on about three layers of black t-shirts and black sweatshirts, kind of hoping I wouldn’t be noticed that much. I would avoid mirrors because it just reminded me of an area where I felt “lacking”.

As I have gotten older, I have had some health issues which caused me to actually lose a lot of weight (at one point I was the same size as my 15 year old sister is now). But even though my size had changed, my perception of myself didn’t change. Even years later, my mindset–all those thoughts I crammed down and believed in my heart–is often that of “you’re still not as beautiful as they are. You’ll never be like them”. At my smallest, I felt the same as when I was at my heaviest. But even on top of the whole “curvy vs slim ‘n trim” issue, (in my opinion) I’ve got a big nose, tiny fingers that are continually cold, one of my bones in my foot sticks out, and I could continue. I’ve memorized every part I don’t like about this body.

“Anna, I don’t like my nose…It’s just a weird shape and I wish I had a different nose!” my little sister’s voice chimed in from the backseat. What? What is she talking about?As we continued to chat, she kept coming up with things she didn’t like. ” Well, Spudnut (my nickname for her), did you realize you are critiquing something that God made? He made you with your cute little nose, and He made you the height you are. Did you know that?” I said gently in reply. “But, YOU don’t like certain things about yourself…..”

WHAM.

Talking about hitting close to home. She hit it out of the ballpark. I had no idea what to say in reply.

But the truth is, when we critique ourselves, we ARE criticizing what God has made. Something He has invested time into designing. Something that He loves.

Today, as you are faced with yourself in the Mirror, here are three things to remember.

1) YOU are a treasure. You have been bought with an unbelievably high ransom–the Blood of Jesus Christ. His Righteousness and Mercy now cover your shoulders, and you can walk in Purity, Joy and TRUTH. God loves you with an UNCONDITIONAL love–one is not based on what we are able to do for Him, but because of what HE has done for US. Your walk with Jesus is not based upon how trendy you are, how skinny you are, or how even your eyes sit within your face. You have the Creator of the Milky Way for a Heavenly Father…and sweet friend, you cannot imagine how dearly He loves you. How dearly He wants YOU to truly know His heart.

2) YOU are usually your biggest critic. Often the main reason we batter ourselves with all the reasons we should be different is because we are holding ourselves up to someone else. Who are you comparing yourself to? Your cute little sister? Your attractive co-worker? The super-trim-blogging-homeschool mom who always seems to have it together while you’re trying to figure out how to get your kids to stop screaming? We see the outward, but we don’t realize the internal struggles. Maybe that sister struggles with intense depression, or maybe that co-worker just found out some horrible news? Maybe that mom has a marriage falling apart. Don’t judge what you merely perceive with your eyes to be the Truth.

3) YOUR outward body will not last forever. I’m sure we can all recite the scripture “charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting….” verse (Prov. 31:30). But do we really take it to heart? We don’t know the time frame that God will allow us to be on earth. As Christians, our very core should be burning to seek and save the lost. Those whose are truly without HOPE. We can be healthy and exercise (which does make you feel better, by the way!), but there has to be a point where we turn our eyes from fretting about ourselves and turn to JESUS. One day (soon) we will be in the presence of the Lord and all these things–the worrying, the self-loathing, the comparison–will be as a mist. It will disappear. We will receive NEW, Healthy, beautiful bodies and be filled with JOY unspeakable for all of Eternity!!!!

So, sweet friend, today, have mercy upon your outward appearance. Instead of skimming over familiar places with disgust, remember that God invested time into your creation. No matter what you look like–no matter if you have bumps, freckles, frizzy hair, curvy or skinny–YOU belong to the King of Kings. You are His. Seek to love Jesus above all. Put scriptures around your room and ON YOUR MIRROR to remember Who it is that you should reflect: Jesus. Let the desire to hold man’s approval slip from between your fingers as you focus on Christ. Seek FIRST His Kingdom. His Will. HIM.

We would love to hear from you! What are some ways that you re-focus your attention on Christ when you have “bad days”? What are some encouraging scriptures that you have found to be helpful? Share them below in the comments! 🙂

Let your beauty be not just the outward adorning of braiding the hair, and of wearing jewels of gold, or of putting on fine clothing;but in the hidden person of the heart, in the incorruptible adornment of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God very precious. 1 Peter 3:3-4

I praise you, for I am fearfully (awe or reverence) and wonderfully (marvelous, astonishingly) made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. Psalm 139:14

 

Photo credit: {✿D-Munkhuulei✿} via Foter.comCC BY-NC-SA

Saving Lives Before They’re Gone

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It happened again this week – a childhood friend had enough of life, and ended his. It wasn’t the first time it has happened with those I have known. But it doesn’t get less painful, or less heartbreaking…and distance of friendship over time doesn’t change a thing. It’s like suddenly the world grinds to a halt, and there’s a definitive end. Where there is life, there is hope… but when life ends, you can’t go back and say the things you wish you could have said, and there are no more second chances.

Nearly every time I have seen this happen, it has come out of a great hopelessness. A hopelessness birthed by a longing for fulfillment, but searching for it in all the wrong places. We all desire acceptance, fulfillment, and the feeling of having made a difference in the word. But oh-so many people seek after these things by chasing darkness. The devil makes many promises to broken, needy hearts, but never delivers. He may entice, but there cannot be any true hope or peace or fulfillment apart from Christ. Jesus is the only one who can break us out of the bondages to sin and darkness, and give us a hope and a future…but so many people do not know that. Now, all of us know someone like this – and, more likely, many “someones”. But, they continue in their dark and empty pursuits day after day. Why? We think it is more caring to just let them live how they want, and not “judge them” or make them feel uncomfortable by sharing Jesus with them.

But how can they know, unless someone tells them? How can they see that breaking God’s laws always leads to emptiness and pain, unless someone cares enough to tell them that what they are doing is, in fact, sin…and that they end of it will be darkness and destruction…and then, takes them by the arm, and shows them that there is, in fact, a better way.

How can they escape the quicksand unless someone tells them what it is that is engulfing them, and then throws them a lifeline?

Do we care enough to speak up?
Will we reach out with their lifeline before it is too late?

Suicide is an epidemic. We can’t tell what is going on in each person’s heart and mind, but from what I have observed, it seems that a greater number of people struggle with depression and suicidal thoughts than those who don’t. You just don’t know who is planning the end of their own life next, or when. We had a woman come to a concert outreach my family did recently, who was planning to kill herself the very next day! But instead, that night she found freedom and hope as she received a new heart from Jesus!

There is nothing that compares to seeing the chains of darkness and despair fall off, and the light of hope in Christ fill a person’s eyes. Prayerfully consider what you can do to reach out with the hope that only Jesus can bring to those you know who are walking down dark and dangerous roads, instead of just closing your eyes to their heart needs, and dismissing their pursuits that will end in emptiness, pain, and
dark despair.

Silence is not caring.
Truly caring is speaking up, and, like Jesus, wishing that none should perish.

“My brothers, if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back, let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.” (James 5:19-20 ESV)

Single? 3 Ways to Have the BEST Valentines Day EVER!

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Valentine’s Day.  That blissful time of year when all of your “non-single” friends get chocolate, and flowers, and romantic candlelight dates.  That dreaded time of year when you hide out under your covers, eat lots of chocolate (that you bought yourself), and avoid everything pink, red, or even remotely romantic.  That, or you’re one of those people who actively torture yourself by scrolling through Facebook, looking at all the sweet things that people did with their “significant other”, and you cry yourself to sleep listening to gushy love songs.  [Some people do it to themselves…just saying. 😉 ]

It’s a wonderful holiday that seems to have been instituted just to remind you of your definite singleness…again.  Not dissimilar to pouring lemon juice on a paper cut [Note: DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME — Just take my word for it.]…or having text messages sent to you continually about the HUGE sale that your favorite store is having…right when you’re completely, totally broke.

So, what’s a single gal to do??

Well, you CAN hole yourself up in your room all day, and have a great big pity party…by yourself. But, I mean…again??  Really??  OR…what if you tried something different this year?

Here are 3 ideas to help you have a Valentines Day worth remembering this year!

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1.  Pray for your single girl-friends.

Start now – don’t wait!  Begin praying for each of your single girl-friends…and ask God to direct your prayers for them.  Pray that God would encourage their hearts, and surround them in His love this year.  Even ask Him to give you specific scriptures that relate to how you can pray to them, or that would be an encouragement to them.  Praying for others is one of the very best ways to get your eyes off of yourself, and get out of your own pity-party.  Making a list may help you to remember to pray for them, and to not forget anyone.

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2. Ask God to show you how to be a blessing to them.

As you’re praying for your friends, ask God to show you how you can be a blessing to them.  Ask Him for ideas of things you can do that would encourage their hearts, and show God’s love to them.  Ask God to make you His hands and feet to show them His love this year.
And then…do it. Whatever God shows you — put it into action!  It may take some real time and effort…and even money, but God will bless you for all you give.  Write out the scriptures God gives you into sweet cards.  Share whatever word of encouragement God puts on your heart for them.  Buy them some flowers…or chocolate…or both!  What do you wish someone would do for you?  Now go and do that for them!  If you really want to go all-out, you can even plan a special evening to invite them over, decorate, and make them a special meal!  Or what about a special girls’ spa night, and devotion time, where you can pray together (spending time with Jesus together is always the sweetest thing)!  The possibilities are endless when you ask God for great ideas — He knows what will most bless each of your friends! And it might be something different for each one.

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3. Spend time with Jesus.

This is last, but definitely most important of all, for truly having the best Valentine’s Day!  Don’t forget to spend time with Jesus, and just enjoy His presence.  Remember: He truly cares about you more than anyone else…and even after you have a loving relationship, and a blessed marriage, no guy can fill that spot in your heart that was meant for only Jesus to fill.  You’re not just spending time with Jesus because you don’t have a boyfriend!  You’re spending time with Jesus because HE is your Love, and your Life!!

Spend time thanking Jesus for all the ways He has shown His love for you this year — even write some of them down to be a reminder of His goodness for you when you’re discouraged.  Don’t rush — how would you like it if you were out for a special time with someone and all they did was look at their watch the whole time??  Take your time to really enjoy God’s presence, and be a real friend for Him.

And why don’t you take some time to actually write God a love-letter this year?  Tell Him all the things you love about Him, and that you can’t imagine your life without Him.  Even pray about what you can give Him as a gift this year — it can be something as simple as giving Him your worries about the future, and committing to trust Him more, and not fear about the future.

 

WHAT ABOUT YOU?? Do you have any other ideas for having a blessed Valentine’s Day?  Have you ever tried reaching out to those who are lonely on Valentine’s Day?  If someone was going to do something kind for you on Valentine’s Day, what do you think you would bless you the most?  Now…how can you take that and use it to bless others?  Share your thoughts in the comments!  We’d love to hear from you, and even feature some of your ideas here!

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Surrounded? Yes, Surrounded.

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Surrounded, it seems, on every side –

The darkness presses in

Grabbing with its wiry arms

Enticing me to sin.

 

How can I stand against it

When it leers from every store,

From every window, every shelf,

And lurks ’round every door?

 

Surrounded? Yes, but greater still:

Surrounded by the Lord!

And surrounded by His heavenly host

Each brandishing a sword!

 

One word, one cry, one call for help

The Lord will fight for me!

His help is sure, His army, swift

As I humbly bend my knee.

 

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From participating in the Tuesday@Ten challenge.

Are You a Competitor or a Co-Laborer?

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By: Anna Faith, an Unshakable Girl Staff Writer

 

I have a love-hate relationship with Pinterest. Nowhere else can you inspire your culinary skills, realize what goes into sewing a dress, discover what the color “sea foam” really looks like on a wall, and realize how little you exercise. All at the same time. You can go from “I want to do that!” to completely overwhelmed by your inadequacy in .37 seconds. [Side note: Check out the Unshakable Girl Pinterest page, for inspiration and encouragement.]

 
Sound familiar?
 
In a world swarmed with a suffocating amount of pressure to perform–to succeed–to do well in all things, sometimes it feels like a hopeless case just being a girl! As I scroll through my media sites yesterday, I felt completely done. Who am I compared to these Diploma holding, fit, super stylish women? They’re hip enough to be trendy, yet personable enough to be relate-able. But it is not simply a comparison of lifestyle to which we fall victim. Even amongst other Christians (!), we play the comparison game. We compare even our relationships with God based off of what we perceive in other’s lives. The glossy, edited versions of their lives that we see flood our screens. The “put together” smiles they seem to show when we pass them at Church. How many scriptures do they post on Social Media? How unique are those verses (bonus points if they’re an Old Testament verse!) ? How many people do they mentor? How many girls are in their Bible Studies? What kind of reviews do they get on their blog? How many places do they volunteer at?
 
We measure ourselves by our perception of others. We test the worthiness of our lives by a “Pass or Fail” label. Little do we realize, in “testing” ourselves, we are also quietly opening deadly doors within our hearts. If we grade ourselves as “Pass”, we are saying (even in our hearts) that we have become better than another person. We are more fit, Spiritual, a better friend, more fashionable, funnier and quietly pat ourselves on the back. Woosh! The door swings open as the suave figure of Pride saunters into our heart. In just a few seconds, we have held ourselves in esteem over another person. On the flip side, when we find ourselves lacking, we stamp a “Fail” onto our outlook.  We aren’t as beautiful, fit, healthy, Spiritual, talented, happy homemaker as they are–and we feel DONE. We crawl into a dark hole of depression and self-pity. 
Creeeeeeaaaaak. The dark, woeful silhouette of Despair crosses the threshold of our hearts. 
 
As uncomfortable as it is to admit it, I am guilty of this exact thing. I have frequently found myself measuring my own life in a “Pass or Fail” standard that I have set. More often than not, I find myself wrestling with Despair as the label “Failure” is sealed on my mind.

 

Sisters in Christ, do you see how painful a cycle we set for ourselves? And how typical of the Deceiver to creep in and turn us into rivals? For we are not rivals, but instead instead co-laborers! YOU are my co-worker, in Christ. For those who are seeking earnestly to expand the Kingdom of Heaven, we are working in the same line of work! We are planting seeds, cultivating, and (by God’s grace) watching the Holy Spirit grow eternal fruit! What an incredible blessing to realize! We are  not working against one another–but WITH one another!
 
So what do we do with all of these thoughts bombarding our minds and infiltrating our hearts? What do we do when we fall into depression?
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1) Repentance. No matter how “good” we may seem to others, we have to get our hearts right with God. Hearts that are full of sin and deceitfulness (Jeremiah 17:9). Simply by looking at others, we puff ourselves up with pride OR we begin to doubt God and His character (through despair, which is the “absence of Hope”). We must realize that our attitudes–our secret striving to be better–is not streaming from a godly heart. We must ask the Lord to forgive us–to fill us with the sweet humility AND Joy which is found in His own dear character! 
 
2) Take Every Thought Captive “to make it obedient to Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5).  Now, I’ve never really heard of someone “accidentally” binding up a prisoner, nor have I heard of a situation where a man was simply walking through the woods and happened upon the VERY person he was hoping to capture. This being the case, we actually have to be looking for those sneaky little thoughts. Carefully on the watch. Although avoiding people forever may seem appealing at times, we technically can’t live in a cave. We have to learn how to bind up those prideful or despairing thoughts–and refuse to let them stay in our minds. When you’re faced with a thought of “wow, I’m so glad I love the Lord more than they seem to” OR “wow, I’ll never be as beautiful or Spiritual as they are”, take that thought and force it out of your mind. Say “NO, I refuse to indulge the devil in his schemes! I belong to Christ and I refuse to dwell on these things!”
 
3) Put On A Garment of Praise. One way the Enemy gets us distracted from our mission of pursuing CHRIST and seeking to bring people TO Christ is getting our focus OFF Jesus. He gets us wound up in our problems. Our feelings. Instead of listening to these emotions knock on the door of your mind, what if we filled our hearts with songs of Worship? What if we poured out actual thanksgiving to a God who cannot lie–a God of Truth, Mercy, Justice and Purity in Heart? Pop in a worship Cd–one that focuses on CHRIST and not on how YOU feel–and let the adoration of Christ fill your room! 
 
4) Practice Honoring and Encouraging. We, as humans, tend to look at numbers. In the Body of Christ, one of the Church’s biggest stumbling block is often “attendance”. How many numbers they can get (and maintain) in their buildings. When we stumble across other blogs or sites, we often look at how many “followers” they have. What if–instead of scanning to see what they have–we viewed it as their “field”?  Those girls that they are surrounded by–what if we view them as the “seeds they are nurturing”?  PRAY for those women you see which hold a high degree of influence. Pray hard for them. Whether they realize it or not, they hold a position of authority within their sphere of influence. Pray that the Love of Christ would be their true desire. Pray for humility. Take time to encourage them with a kind word (or comment on their website)! 
 
It can also be so very easy to look at someone who the Lord is blessing in certain areas and, instead of rejoicing with them and being glad for God’s blessing on their lives/ministry/etc., we are jealous, grumbling, criticizing — perhaps without even realizing it — because, deep inside, we want what they have. We think, “I’m serving God just as much as they are…so why did God bless THEM in that way, and not ME?” “I have been working longer and harder than they have…but I haven’t seen nearly as much fruit as they have in just a few short weeks/months/years.” “We both love the Lord, but why did God bless HER with an uber-godly husband, and leave me still laboring on my own? She shouldn’t have more blessing than I have!”
 
Again…this self-righteousness and pride can so easily slip in – especially when you begin serving the Lord, and find out what a long road of self-denial and labor pains it really is…and how firmly you must hold fast to the Lord’s promises in faith, when everything around you looks bleak and difficulties arise and surround you.
 
But we MUST fight against these attitudes, because we are not trying to promote ourselves! We are called to simply be faithful in whatever God has called us to, proclaim the Gospel, and leave the rest up to Him. Fruitfulness is not the ultimate test of our calling and purpose. The ultimate test is our FAITHFULNESS. And the only way we can truly remain faithful is to fix our gaze on Jesus, and rest in His good character, and hold firmly onto His promises, which will never fail us. We cannot measure our success, or the greatness of God’s love based on outward signs of fruit and favor and everything always going perfectly for us (or the lack thereof)! But we look to His promises, which are unchanging, and trust in His love, which does not fade. And remember, that we are all working together, in the unique ways that He has called each of us…and we are called to “rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep”. Not gazing at ourselves and our own struggles continually, but forcing ourselves to look outward — into Heaven, and into the needs and blessings of others…and loving them with HIS love.
 
Above all, pursue Christ. Truly pursue Him. Not just in a “I’ll get around to having a close relationship with Him one day. I’m just too busy right now”. No. TODAY is that day! Sisters, if we are to be Salt and Light in a world that is (very quickly) perishing before our eyes, we must set our priorities straight. We must thwart the schemes of the Devil by building one another up in a true sacrificial Love. A love where we think LESS about ourselves–our feelings–and more on serving others with JOY. The world is to know us as Christians by our love for each other (John 13:35). Let us seek to Love Christ with all our hearts, souls and mind–and to truly love our neighbor (or Sister in Christ) as ourselves.
 
Side note:
I do want to mention the fact that if you are struggling with a particular issue, PLEASE email us. We are here to pray, encourage and love on YOU. Yes, YOU. We want to be a friend, true sisters, and a blessing to you. If you are going through a difficult season of life, if you are struggling with self-hate or depression–please contact us. We would love to connect with you and pray for you personally. 
Also, please share this post, so that we can spread the truth and encouragement of God’s Word far and wide! There are “Share” buttons below to make it quick and easy to share this post with your circles of friends.

How to Make Time to Pray

 

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It happened again this morning.

I got upset. My heart felt thin and cold…and I lost patience with my daughter, and those around me. It wasn’t a big explosion, or an argument…in fact, I didn’t really even say anything. It was just my heart hardening, and raging, and really, just feeling sorry for myself.

I moped away, crying. It was a totally un-related situation that caused the hardening to surface…and yet, as I stewed, I just kept telling myself, “All I wanted was to be able to pray. All I wanted was to have a quiet morning to pray, and to not have to deal with the ceaseless chatter of my daughter…and now? Now I have the weight of my sinful heart to deal with on top of it all! How wrong can it be to just want peace and quiet, and the ability to pray?”

I was hoping for a “magical” opening to pray this morning. Feeling the need of it even stronger than usual, after a restless night, and a headache on top of feeling so, so weary this morning. Not even coffee could make me feel like I could face this day.

I knew the feeling. I’ve gotten quite familiar with it now. It was my spirit longing to be close to it’s Maker. It was my spirit panting for living water. And…it was also my very human heart feeling a tinge of guilt for having not made more of an effort to get up earlier to pray before my daughter woke up…and feeling like I had lost my chance…and not really wanting to own up to my own laziness. I decided it was easier to blame those around me for the way I was feeling, than to admit that my utter emptiness was because I had made excuses, and put forth the effort I needed to, to be filled with the Strength that is not my own for this day.

The truth is…there’s never a “magical” opening to pray, where your environment and circumstances all end up aligning to create that perfect “prayer room” atmosphere. Least of all, when you’re a mommy, and/or have a demanding job, and/or school work that has taken over every free grey cell of your brain. Yeah…I know. I know it all too well. Why? Well, it’s the same for every single one of us. We all think that there’s something “special” or “unusual” about our current situations that gives us an excuse for not having a closer walk with Jesus. We think, “If I can just make it through this ______ (day, week, year), I am sure there is a time coming when I can *actually* just ENJOY spending time with Jesus, and actually have a chunk of time to use each day for seeking Him earnestly.”

BUT…the truth is…we will never find time to pray.

Never.

Ever.

Nope — not gonna happen.

We must make time to pray (yes, I am preaching to myself here, too…as usual). And often, this will include having to wrestle for it, as if it were a 300 pound octopus; with every.drop.of.strength we can muster.

We have to say, “My time with Jesus is the most important part of my day, and I’m going to treat it like that. I can’t live, or have any joy or peace in my day by trying to plow through it in my own strength. I already know that – as much as I may try to ignore it. I know that everything I try to do by myself ends up being unfulfilling, or exhausting, or taking way longer than it should, or just plain being a total flop. I NEED Jesus.”

And then, we must do whatever it takes to take that time captive.

For me, this morning, it meant saying to my 2-year-old daughter, “Can you please go play quietly in your room for a little bit? Mommy just really needs to pray for a while.” And, to my surprise, she went…and I sat on the couch and prayed through my tears…and shouted many, “Hallelujah’s” out loud. Even when she crept back into the living room, she whispered to herself, knowing that I was praying, and needed to not be interrupted. (There went all my distress over being *certain* I had missed my ONE chance, and wouldn’t be able to even think over her rather loud, bubbly chatter all day long.) I am so grateful that she has grown up in a house of prayer, and that she is beginning to understand, even just a little, the seriousness and need for earnest prayer.

For you, it may be different. Maybe you have many more children…or perhaps, you have children who don’t listen when you ask them to be quiet (as I’ve frequently experienced with mine as well — today was a mercy from God!). Don’t give up! Susanna Wesley had 19 children (yes…you read that right: NINETEEN children), and she would frequently feel that same nudge in her spirit that I felt today, and the one that perhaps you are feeling even now; that thirst and desperate heart cry for Living Water. And, right in the middle of the chaos, and commotion of everyday life with a house FULL of children, she would sit down in her chair, and fling her apron over her head to create just the smallest bit of personal space to be with Jesus…and she would pray for as long as she needed. Her children came to realize that when mommy had her apron over her head, that meant that they were not to disturb her. You CAN do this too, in whatever way you need. It is *not* neglecting your children, it is receiving the strength that you can’t manufacture on your own to be the mommy that they need.

Perhaps your situation is different entirely. Perhaps it is the busyness of school, or work that seems to crowd out your time with Jesus. The principal is the same: Do what you must, but don’t neglect that most needed time with the Lord. Sacrifice an hour of sleep to pray early in the morning. Use your lunch break. Don’t go to sleep without sweet communion with the Lord, and soaking up His Word. Surrender your time to surf the web, and pray instead. Don’t watch that TV show — pray! Do whatever you must…but pray. Oh, dear fellow child of God…we must not neglect time to really, earnestly pray — it is our life, and our breath! And even in the most extreme situations, don’t despise grabbing just 15 minutes here and there. A little time to pray is better than none at all! And it will add up! It is remarkable what battles can be won, and what peace can be obtained in just 15 minutes of concentrated, earnest prayer.

So be encouraged to seek the time with Jesus each day…and to take hold of it!

What are some ways you can “capture” that time to pray in your own day?

 

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Esther, from Wellness Mom Life says in the comments: “Such a beautiful post. I too used to think that I would magically be given time to pray – that somehow it would be dropped in my lap. I’ve now realized that does not happen, as you said. I do my best to get up earlier now, so that I have specific time alone with God before I start my day. And I also do my best to talk to God all day long. To acknowledge Him in every part of my day – not just when I have a crisis. But this is a great reminder that moms CAN make time for prayer – we just have to be intentional about it!”

 

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What to Do…When You Don’t Know What to Do.

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Following God is simple. But most of the time, it’s not exactly what any of us would expect.

People press in around us from the time we enter middle school, with questions, suggestions, always wondering what we’re going to do with our lives – urging us to make decisions, and follow our dreams, watching us, waiting for us to do something big – amazing – something to change the world. They’re always so supportive of the kids who decide that, when they grow up, they’re going to be a doctor, a firefighter, or a hairdresser. But for any who might be tender enough to voice their desire to be a “missionary”, there is often polite laughter, a pat on the head, and unending, “But what are you REALLY going to do with your life?” questions. And for those who don’t even have a clue, there is so much pressure to jump into college and spend tens of thousands of dollars “figuring out” what you want to do…because…well…you’ve got to be doing SOMETHING.

But let’s take a step back for a moment. Let’s lay aside all the pressure, the opinions, the advice…and just quiet our souls for a minute. There are always more things to be done, things that COULD be done, things that people think you should be doing. But what is it that God wants you to do? There is one question that keeps me going, and helps me to stay focused when my brain is trying to go 120 different directions at once…and my body can’t even comprehend what it would mean to keep up. Then the Holy Spirit cuts through my anxious, overwhelmed thoughts and says, “What if Jesus was coming back today? What would you want to accomplish before His return? What do you want to be doing when He comes back? Now DO that.”

That one line of thinking can change everything. In that light, there are suddenly a lot of things that seemed important, but aren’t. A lot of pressure that doesn’t need to exist. A lot of hesitation and questioning that can be swept away. And so much freedom to throw yourself into the Lord’s service with abandon.

If Jesus was coming back today, I would want to rescue as many lives as I could. I would want to share the gospel with as many people as possible. I would want to take advantage of every meeting with someone, whether at the store or on the street as if it was their last chance to be saved from judgement.

If Christ’s return was imminent, I wouldn’t have to worry about having enough money saved up. I wouldn’t worry about what people thought about me. I wouldn’t worry about having a good enough education. I would take what I do have, and what I do know, and go out into the world and preach the gospel. I would lay aside all my own plans, desires, and dreams…and every vision of success in the world, or what the world says I need to do or have. I would set out with just Jesus, and courageously go forth to do whatever He set before me. I would let Him fully and truly live through me, to do the things that are on His heart to do; the things that He would want to do if He was in His own body on earth right beside me.

Following God’s will isn’t that complicated. We can make it complicated, by inserting all of our “what-if’s” and fears and plans for ourselves. But really, if we were all perfectly honest, we would know what God is asking of us. We would know what His will is — it is to go forth and share the gospel with every person. No degrees required. And, if we could truly trust Him to provide, there would be no need to worry about money, or organizations supporting us, or anything. We could actually just go wherever He lead us.

It’s not complicated. But it’s not easy. It means that our lives are not our own. It means all of the rosy plans we had for ourselves are no longer our goal or aim. It means that any acclaim of the world, any recognition, any hope of fun or doing what we like or what we feel is our “gifting” is gone…and replaced by the urgency to just get out in any way possible and share the gospel with whoever will listen. Laying down our own lives to share God’s amazing love with the hurting, broken world at our doorstep.

God’s will means simply saying, “yes”. And going.

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Katie Davis is an excellent modern-day example of a life surrendered to God, and what He can do through one who lays down their own desires and plans and ideas of what would be “fun” in order to rescue lives, and share God’s love. Katie was just a normal teenager in pursuit of all the things that were on the normal teenager’s mind: popularity, boys, a good career….and then, God showed up and turned her world upside-down.

After she graduated from high-school, she had decided to take a year off before going to college. She signed up for a short-term mission trip to a Ugandan orphanage, and, as she said, “I moved over there thinking that I would be there for a year and then I would come back and go to college and be normal again.” But God had other plans.

While she was there, God captured her heart and opened her eyes to see the desperate need of the people there…for someone to love them and to show them a better way.

“I quit my life…I quit college; I quit cute designer clothes and my little yellow convertible; I quit my boyfriend. I no longer have all the things the world says are important.”

Then…God took her back to Uganda, with no plans to ever return to her home land, and began to make her a mom, at 19, to little Ugandan girls who had no one to love them. God brought them to her, one-by-one, until she had 13 little ones in her care, and gave her charge over them as their mother, to love them, snuggle them, teach them, clean them…and to tell them about Jesus. She also started a ministry in her home, to any who wanted to come. She started “Amazima Ministries”, so that the destitute children would have someone to sponsor them, and so they could eat and go to school.

You might think, “Wow. It takes a special person to do that! I could never do something like that.” No! Don’t even think that way, friends! That thought is where the call of God dies. You must understand that NO ONE is spectacularly gifted to love people like that. We are all weak, sinful, and sorely lacking the love it takes. BUT, Jesus has said, “Come, and drink freely!” He has promised to give us all we need to do the work He sets before us. It’s not about how capable we are…it’s about allowing God to fill us with HIS power and strength, and to work and live through us.

As Katie expressed so well, “I remember when I wasn’t ready to move to Uganda. I remember when I wasn’t ready to kiss the people I loved the most goodbye. I remember when I didn’t have enough money to sponsor just ten children, and I remember when I wasn’t old enough to be a mother, and I remember when I didn’t know how to parent. I remember when I couldn’t cook for fifteen people and when I didn’t want to share my house and my things and my life with sick people and addicts. I remember when I was afraid of the slum community that now holds hundreds of friends and when I was terrified that my daughter would never walk and when I was scared that we would never heal after tragic loss. And I remember that never, not once, was I really as ready as I wanted to be. And I remember that God kept all His promises, every last one, in His perfect time.

This new season looms and I don’t know what is next. But He doesn’t need me to be ready for this season because He is ready. He just needs me to be clinging to His feet.

Now. This is where He has called us.”

“People tell me I am brave. People tell me I am strong. People tell me good job. Well here is the truth of it. I am really not that brave, I am not really that strong, and I am not doing anything spectacular. I am just doing what God called me to do as a follower of Him. Feed His sheep, do unto the least of His people.”

“I want to give everything, no matter the cost, because I believe that nothing is a sacrifice in light of eternity with Christ.”

“The goal of the book [“Kisses From Katie”] was for other people to be encouraged that, in small steps of obedience to God, he can create something more extraordinary than you could have imagined. When people come into my story from this side of things, they might say, ‘Oh, this young girl has this organization and all these children—either she’s totally crazy or she’s gotta’ be incredible.’ I’m neither, but the story started with one open door of going to this third-world country. I said yes, and then God placed needs in front of me, and I tried to meet them in the best way I could.

I think prayer is key. I would encourage people to follow and obey, and try to serve others one step at a time, whoever is in front of them. If there is an open door to go to a foreign country and it is something you want to explore, walk through the open door. Once you get there, God will open other doors and bring needs to you. And as you meet the needs right in front of you, he can build something different than we ever would have thought or planned.”

“Maybe courage is not at all about the absence of fear but about obedience even when we are afraid. Courage is trusting when we don’t know what is next, leaning into the hard and knowing that it will be hard, but more, God will be near.  Maybe bravery is just looking fear in the face and telling it that it does not win because I have known The Lord here. I have known The Lord in the long, dark night.

We still tremble, but more than that we have faith. Even though we feel uncertain, we press into a God who is so certain, so sure, so steady. He carries us, He lifts our heads. And His unfailing love and comfort becomes our courage and our hope.”

So what is God’s will for you? Be faithful to do what He sets before you. Move forward through one door, and He will open another. Trust, and, as God has told me very seriously: make sure to do nothing out of fear.